Becci told us that she's always struggled with mental health and one day, the anxiety and pressures of raising a young family got too much. Everything changed through a conversation at a baby massage class. This is her story of how a Home-Start day out was the beginning of big change. 

"I used to feel like my world was shrinking to the four walls of our little house. My son was two and a half, full of energy and struggling with what we now know are ADHD traits, and my daughter was a newborn.

As well as my son having big emotions, and regular tantrums, my son doesn’t sleep, he never has slept properly. He will have an hour and then wake up, this goes on all through the night. This was so hard with a newborn. It was taking a toll on me.

My husband works full-time, and I was with the children on my own daily. I was exhausted, frightened to go out, and convinced everyone was judging me. Most days, I stayed home because it felt safer than facing the looks, the whispers, or another meltdown in public.

Everything changed because of a simple conversation at a baby massage class. Someone mentioned Home-Start and a trip they were organising, and although I was terrified to take the children out on my own, I decided to go.

I remember standing there at the farm, heart racing, thinking we’d last ten minutes before I’d have to leave. Instead, a volunteer stayed by my side all day. I didn’t think we would ever be able to stay out all day. When my son struggled, she held the baby. When I felt overwhelmed, she reassured me. For the first time in years, I felt like I wasn’t alone.

That one day led to a weekly Home-Start group. I almost didn’t go to this either, I’d never liked groups before because my son found them hard, and I felt judged. I had tried going to groups before, but I couldn’t relax, I was always worried about what might happen and wasn’t able to relax. My son’s behaviour would make groups really difficult. But the Home-Start group was different. We sat around one table, together. No cliques. No whispers. Just parents who understood and staff and volunteers who were so kind and helpful.

Slowly, I started to breathe again. I made friends at the group. I laughed and started to relax in this new environment. I realised other mums were dealing with similar challenges. That feeling of “I’m not the only one” was life-changing. I felt like I was being taken seriously and that people wanted to make things better for me.

Home-Start didn’t just help emotionally, they helped practically, too. When my son’s behaviour became aggressive towards his sister at home, a Home-Start person came to our house. She spoke to me about managing challenging behaviours, sleep routines, and looked at our cramped bedrooms, and helped us reorganise things so everyone could sleep safely. She suggested sensory toys and showed us how to use them.

Now, after school, my son goes straight to his room to calm himself. My daughter sleeps peacefully in her own bed. It might sound small, but for us it was huge.

Before Home-Start, I honestly think I’d still be stuck at home, drowning in anxiety. I’ve struggled with my mental health in the past, and without that weekly conversation, I know I’d be in a much darker place. Fridays reset me and recharge me. They give me strength for another week.

We’re years down the line now, and I still go to the group. My children are growing up alongside friends we met there. I’ve found confidence I didn’t know I had. I can speak up for my son at school, manage my self-employed work as a dog groomer and cope better with life’s challenges.

Home-Start gave me courage and community when I needed it most. And it showed me that even on the hardest days, I’m not alone."